Archives For Marriage and Singleness

The contents of this page are found in the comment section below.  Please leave your testimony (as a comment) of how the Beyond the Battle book has helped you in your life, your walk with God, your marriage, or your singleness.

Please leave your prayer requests that relate to contents of BTB and your life.

Pray for those who have posted testimonies and prayer requests.

Feel free to post prayers and encouragement as replies to comments.

Feel free to post anonymously if you prefer.

I’m the dad of 3 girls and am afraid of the world of sexual harassment and abuse my daughters are going to have to navigate.

I’m also the author of Beyond the Battle: a man’s guide to his identity in Christ in an oversexualized world, a book that, among other things, helps men rewire their minds so we don’t become sexual harassers or abusers.

Needless to say, I think (and write) about this subject a lot.  I also live in Lansing, MI, where every day there are new headlines in the paper about Michigan State University and USA Gymnastics’ Dr. Larry Nassar’s sexual abuse of hundreds of girls and women athletes over a span of decades.  Those could have been my daughters had things been off by a few years.

I put the phrase “an oversexualized world” into the subtitle of my book very intentionally.  No one can argue that our world isn’t oversexualized.  My question is, why aren’t more people doing something about it?  I’m convinced that as a society as a whole, we want the best of both worlds.  We want to have our cake and eat it too.  We want to do whatever we want sexually: have sex before marriage, have casual sex, have porn in our popular movies and Netflix shows, look at the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition, and have a general culture that “if you want to have sex, then have it.”  To argue against this puts you in what feels like a small, unpopular minority.  But when this mindset toward sex produces its inevitable result: broken hearts and broken spirits, let alone sexual harassment, rape, and sexual abuse, we are all dumbfounded as to where these things came from. Continue Reading…

My latest article is up on Covenant Eyes, “Women are Daughters, not Objects.”  Check it out here!

 

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This is the landing page for my upcoming book Beyond the Battle: A man’s guide to his identity in Christ in an oversexualized world.  The book will be available in January 2018, exact date TBD.  Books will sell on Amazon for $14.99 each or you can purchase in bulk from this page you are currently on (atacrossroads.net/beyond-the-battle).  The bulk prices will be 10 books for $100 ($10/each) or 30 books for $240 ($8 each) or 100 books for $600 ($6 each) (shipping price will be added, or you can pick up from Lansing, MI).  The book will have its greatest impact when men read it along with other men.  It comes with free small group curriculum and videos.

Check out the free 6-week men’s small group video curriculum here. 

I’ll post updates on details here as they unfold.  You can also subscribe to my Author Newsletter (below) to get details emailed to your inbox along with ways you can help with the book launch.  I’ll also send out forthcoming details on Beyond the Battle‘s parallel book for women, More than a Princess, and the 6-week all-church campaign “40 Days of Purity” that will include sermon outlines and videos to go along with small group curriculum for men and women.

I’d also love to come and speak at your church or special event (no fee), please contact me to make those arrangements.

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Back cover text:

What if the battle you’re fighting has already been won?

 

As men fight for contentment in their marriages or their singleness, our oversexualized world continues to pump out false promises.  What if the answer to your heart’s longing is not to try harder or fight more intensely?  What if there’s actually more to the battle than accountability, online filters, and training away the symptoms of the problem (as important as those tools are)?

 

The good news is that there really is more to this battle, and victory depends not on your ability to fight, but on your ability to rest.  It’s not about working hard to avoid lust, it’s about God working in you to remove (and replace) your desire for it.

 

Beyond the Battle dives below the surface to uncover soul-deep solutions.  You will discover that everything you hoped the next woman would give you is already freely yours in Jesus.  This identity in Christ will satisfy you to the core, allowing you to see yourself and women the way God intended all along.

 

For those who have been following my publishing journey, you may have been wondering when, if ever, my book was actually going to get published.  I got an agent back in Fall 2015 and I thought it’d be a pretty quick process from there.  Little did I know what the future held…

After interviewing a lot of authors on my podcast who have struggled with the ups and downs of the publishing industry, I now have firsthand knowledge.  The #1 reason I am indie-publishing (besides the fact that it has taken forever to try to get a big publisher) is because of the damage the process has done to my soul.  The way Christian publishing works nowadays is you need a “platform” in order to get published.  For some authors, their platform exists in the books they published before the “platform” / social media era took over.  For others, being the head of a large organization or pastoring a megachurch is the platform.  For someone trying to get his first book published and who does not pastor a megachurch, my platform lies in how many people read my blog, my podcast listens, follow me on Twitter, etc.  In essence, my statistics prove if I am worthwhile to a publisher or not.  Continue Reading…