Archives For lust

Men, here are 4 reasons you should NOT read Beyond the Battle: A Man’s Guide to His Identity in Christ in an Oversexualized World by Noah Filipiak:

1. You don’t struggle with lust at all.  You never check out attractive women when they walk by.  You don’t have any desire to look at internet porn or nudity in TV shows and movies.
2. You do lust, look at porn, watch Game of Thrones, etc. but you don’t think it’s a sin and you don’t have a problem with it.
3A. You are completely content in your marriage. Your wife is the definition of perfection in every way.  You never wish she would change anything or act differently.
3B. You are completely content in your singleness.  You never struggle with God about why you aren’t married.
4. Because Noah Filipiak is not a celebrity, and you know that only celebrities have good or helpful things to say.

If any of these apply to you, make sure you do NOT click on the following link: Beyond the Battle: A Man’s Guide to His Identity in Christ in an Oversexualized World by Noah Filipiak

 

There is a trend in our culture where if you are attracted to the same sex, attracted to both sexes, or identify as a different gender than your birth gender, the cultural tide tells you to go with how you feel, be yourself, and live into these feelings and attractions.

It can feel like there are only two paths: the cultural path of living by your feelings / orientation or the biblical path of living according to what the Bible says.  This dichotomy that’s been set up by the Church and by culture doesn’t give the whole picture though; it’s like we’re playing a game of chess with only a quarter of the board.

A primary breakdown in this dichotomy is that “the biblical path” is often seen by both culture and the Church as meaning “the straight path,” as in, if you’re straight, you’ve met the Bible’s standard.  Heterosexual sin within the Church is no big deal, while homosexual sin gets all of the attention.  This dichotomy also assumes that the solution for someone who is gay is for them to become straight, something that is usually not possible.

Is heterosexual sin spoken against in the Bible?  Yes.  Clearly and directly and repeatedly.  From lust, to adultery, to divorce, heterosexual sin is called out as direct rebellion against a holy God.

Why is Jesus so harsh against lust and divorce? (Matthew 5:27-32)  It’s because God created sex to be between a man and a woman in the context of marriage alone.  Does that line feel familiar to you?  It might remind you of debates that go on between culture and the Church (or between the Church and the Church) about homosexuality.  And it begins to reveal a few more of the missing squares on the chess board…

Those who are gay, lesbian and transgender get all of the spotlight when it comes to conforming to the Bible’s design for sex—not that they are asking for it, but as a heterosexual with tons of sexual disorientation issues, I have to say I’m a little jealous. Continue Reading…

Christians are to save sex until marriage and are to keep it there.  (Genesis 2:24; 1 Corinthians 6:12-20)

And fantasizing about sex outside of marriage is the same heart condition as engaging in it.  (Matthew 5:27-28)

These sound like some pretty strict “thou shalt not’s!”  It’s very important that we understand why God gave us these commands, as it wasn’t just to ruin our fun.  In a nutshell, sex is potent and volatile.  Our world has duped us into believing it’s only about body parts and impulses, but we all know it involves much more intimacy and vulnerability than that.  Deception is played, hearts are broken and selfishness runs rampant.  Instead of looking at another person as a human being, we’ve been conditioned to see them as objects to be used for our consumption and then discarded.

This is a problem. Continue Reading…

The New York Post had a nude photo of Donald Trump’s wife Melania on its cover this week, with the title “Ogle Office.”  The photo was taken around 20 years ago, when Melania was 25 years old, in the thick of her modeling career and before she met Donald.  It was from a now defunct French men’s magazine, according to CNN.com.

Ivanka Trump, Donald Trump's daughter

Ivanka Trump, Donald Trump’s daughter

Ironically timed, there’s an article in today’s USA Today with Donald and son Eric’s thoughts on how (Donald’s daughter / Eric’s sister) 34-year-old Ivanka Trump would handle being sexually harassed.  Ivanka is a business woman and former model.  This was a response to a previous USA Today article where Donald says he thinks Ivanka should find a new job if she was being harassed in her workplace.  The articles, written by Mary Bowerman and Kirsten Powers respectively, both denounce Donald for insinuating it’s a woman’s fault if she’s sexually harassed.  Powers’ article sums up the feeling well in her last sentence:

All together now: Women don’t cause sexual harassment, harassers do.

Before I get in to my thoughts, let me say that I agree with Powers’ sentiment here.  As a pastor, I would re-frame it to say that a person (in this case the harasser) is responsible and accountable for their own sin.  No excuses.  Period. Continue Reading…

My latest article published on Covenant Eyes’ blog is entitled The Growl of An Empty Stomach.  It’s about why we are drawn to sexual and relational temptation and how we can cure our symptoms.

growl-of-an-empty-stomach