Archives For sexual purity

This is the landing page for my upcoming book Beyond the Battle: A man’s guide to his identity in Christ in an oversexualized world.  The book will be available in the Fall 2017, date TBD.  Books will sell on Amazon for $14.99 each or you can purchase in bulk from this page you are currently on (atacrossroads.net/beyond-the-battle).  The bulk prices will be 10 books for $100 or 30 books for $225 (shipping price will be added, or you can pick up from Lansing, MI).  The book will have its greatest impact when men read it along with other men.

Check out the free 6-week men’s small group video curriculum here. 

I’ll post updates on details here as they unfold.  You can also subscribe to my Author Newsletter to get details emailed to your inbox along with ways you can help with the book launch and forthcoming details on Beyond the Battle‘s parallel book for women, More than a Princess. 

I’d also love to come and speak at your church or special event (no fee), please contact me to make those arrangements.

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Back cover text:

What if the battle you’re fighting has already been won?

 

As men fight for contentment in their marriages or their singleness, our oversexualized world continues to pump out false promises.  What if the answer to your heart’s longing is not to try harder or fight more intensely?  What if there’s actually more to the battle than accountability, online filters, and training away the symptoms of the problem (as important as those tools are)?

 

The good news is that there really is more to this battle, and victory depends not on your ability to fight, but on your ability to rest.  It’s not about working hard to avoid lust, it’s about God working in you to remove (and replace) your desire for it.

 

Beyond the Battle dives below the surface to uncover soul-deep solutions.  You will discover that everything you hoped the next woman would give you is already freely yours in Jesus.  This identity in Christ will satisfy you to the core, allowing you to see yourself and women the way God intended all along.

 

Beyond the Battle: A man’s guide to his identity in Christ in an oversexualized world will be available in Fall 2017, stay tuned for book launch updates by signing up for my author newsletter:

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  Small group video instructions:

  1. Play the video with your men’s small group at the beginning of your group time
  2. Go through the group discussion questions found in Appendix A of Beyond the Battle.  There will be questions about the video and separate questions about the correlating chapters in the book.
  3. The videos divide the book into 6 different small group readings and discussions.  The design is to have a 6-week men’s small group to cover all the material, though you may find it beneficial to have a 12 week small group, committing two meetings to cover each video and question set.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For those who have been following my publishing journey, you may have been wondering when, if ever, my book was actually going to get published.  I got an agent back in Fall 2015 and I thought it’d be a pretty quick process from there.  Little did I know what the future held…

After interviewing a lot of authors on my podcast who have struggled with the ups and downs of the publishing industry, I now have firsthand knowledge.  The #1 reason I am indie-publishing (besides the fact that it has taken forever to try to get a big publisher) is because of the damage the process has done to my soul.  The way Christian publishing works nowadays is you need a “platform” in order to get published.  For some authors, their platform exists in the books they published before the “platform” / social media era took over.  For others, being the head of a large organization or pastoring a megachurch is the platform.  For someone trying to get his first book published and who does not pastor a megachurch, my platform lies in how many people read my blog, my podcast listens, follow me on Twitter, etc.  In essence, my statistics prove if I am worthwhile to a publisher or not.  Continue Reading…

An article in the USA Today section of the Lansing State Journal caught my eye recently, “Sex before first date OK, but a cracked phone? Think again.”  The article breaks down some of the 2017 Singles in America survey, an annual survey funded by the dating service Match.  The most jaw-dropping takeaway from the survey is that 34% of singles have had sex before a first date.  This was followed up by a quote from Match’s chief scientific adviser Helen Fisher:

Sex before the first date could be a ‘sex interview,’ where they want to know if they want to spend time with this person.

And from Kimberly Resnick Anderson, a licensed clinical social worker and sex therapist:

We used to think of sex as you crossed the line now you are in an intimate zone, but now sex is almost a given and it’s not the intimate part.  The intimate part is getting to know someone and going on a date.

Let that sink in for a second.

It used to be that people were taught to save sex until marriage, now they aren’t even saving it until the first date! Continue Reading…

The Ask Amy column is originally written for The Denver Post and syndicated to other newspapers, including mine.  The December 16th column caught my attention:

Ask Amy: Teen in relationship with older man worries about sex in college

The columns are written by Amy Dickinson and great priority is given to allowing people to do whatever they want sexually as the answer to confusing relationship questions that are sent in.  I don’t read it very often because the answer is always pretty much the same, “do what you feel like doing and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise…oh, and make sure you use a condom,” which is why December 16th caught my eye.  I wondered how Amy was going to tell a teen to keep having sex with an older man or to tell the older man to keep having sex with the teen, all in the “express your freedom” and “free love” spirit of most of the columns.  This is not a bashing session on Amy Dickinson, as she is only a reflection on the rest of our culture.  A culture that thinks it can live by an “anything goes” rule for sex, without paying a price for it.  Meanwhile this very culture is crumbling to bits on the micro and macro level because of this abiding rule, but we continue snorting the drug even more rapidly than before.  There’s a reason Ask Amy is widely syndicated: people like being told they can do whatever they want sexually, with Amy even giving them a feeling of morality and good conscious to go along with it.

Now, back to the teen and older man… Continue Reading…